When in the workplace, be careful with what you say. Even one-liners can get you into hot water. When you are unsure what to say, say nothing.
Here is a list of one-liners to avoid:
- I was unsure of the due date
- How was I supposed to know?
- This is only the third time this month I’ve been late
- I decided to avoid the customer because he was rude
- Look … the project failed, but I did my part
- We finished the work on time but the quality is just so-so
- I decided not to attend the sales event because it was raining too hard, and I forgot my umbrella
- The IT people told me that stuff I was doing on Facebook probably led to the virus infection on my computer
- I am neither accountable nor responsible
- I decided that working late is cutting into some of my personal time
- Working in teams is counterproductive because other opinions bother me
- Having to report to others is a waste of time
- Self-development is overrated
- I think 90-minute lunch breaks should be adopted here
- There is nothing wrong with resistance to change – one less thing to worry about
- I start getting tired around 10 am
- We need to limit the number of customers who call for new orders
- I am uncomfortable around people
- I’m okay with meetings, but let’s avoid the action items
- I only like to work with people who think like me
- Let’s focus on workarounds, and stop worrying about resolving the root causes
- Being rude is just the way I am – sorry!
- Even when I am wrong, I tend to be right
- I showed up to work on Saturday still feeling the effects of the vodka from the night before
- When in doubt, I make assumptions
- Avoid asking me to do any work beyond what I was hired to do
- Most of the managers I’ve had over the years demand too much from me
- My saying: “Do unto others before they do unto me
- My approach is to work hard for a few hours each day, and coast the rest of the way
- People should know that I say insulting things when I am depressed, angry, or both
While some of these one-liners are funny, I’ve heard most of them at some point. If you are unhappy where you work, many of these thoughts might come to your mind.
Find a career that interests you. It all starts with you. You must determine your skills, knowledge, and passion. With that in mind, search for the right opportunity.