Author: Dr. Flores Page 22 of 44

I was recently visiting Orlando, Florida. I wanted to make one more stop in Ft. Lauderdale before coming home, so I purchased a ticket on a smaller carrier that flies this short route.

Boarding the Flight

Upon boarding the airplane, I noticed that the flight attendant (Sandy) was quite friendly.

ME: Good morning!

SANDY: Good morning!

ME: I’m the first one on the flight today. Now I have to find space to put this big carry-on bag.

SANDY: You might need to take some stuff out, but it can be done.

ME: Yeah, I’ve done it before. How are you?

SANDY: Much better now that you’re onboard.

[I didn’t know how to take this comment, but I was able to think of something before walking towards my seat.]

ME: You’re sweet. Glad to be here!

The Flight

There were plenty of open seats on this flight, and I was fortunate to have an exit row aisle. These seats are as close as you will get to First Class on a small aircraft. On the other side of the aisle sat a man (Cliff) in his late 40s. He and I struck up a conversation about Florida, and I soon learned that he also lived in Texas.

During the in-cabin service, Cliff purchased a Bloody Mary, and this early morning request led to a jovial conversation with Sandy, which lasted for a few minutes. During this short chat, they both even shared they were divorced.

After Sandy continued with the service, Cliff told me that he was going to grab a business card and give it to Sandy. He lived in Texas, and Sandy stated she was going to take a job with another airline in Texas, so it could work out for them.

Cliff and I discussed the strategy of how he was going to give her the card. We were about middle-of-the-pack in the airplane, so there would be passengers behind us, and he was nervous about how Sandy would react.

We discussed different lines he could use:

• “Sandy, it was good meeting you. Stay in touch!”
• “Now that you’re moving to Texas, let’s have lunch.”
• “Let me know if you need any help when moving to Texas.” [This one was a bit weird, but we were brainstorming.]

Game Time!

Finally, the flight arrives in Ft. Lauderdale, and we are in the deplaning process. Cliff seems even more nervous now. As the “dating” coach, I remind him that he will do well. What’s the worst that can happen? She could deny the card, but this is not too likely. She seems nice enough to at least take the card with a smile.

Cliff finally approaches the front of the plane, and he makes eye contact with Sandy. The cockpit door is open, and the captain is standing sideways, not paying any attention to departing passengers.

I hear Cliff say, “Sandy, it was great talking with you. Have a great rest of the day!”

No! This is not what we practiced! The first part of the line was fine, but he needed to tell her that they should stay in touch. Of course, providing his business card is a must! It didn’t happen!

This lesson taught me one of two things: (1) I’m a poor dating coach, or (2) Cliff got cold feet. I guess there is probably a reason this encounter didn’t happen. I suppose.

I attended a charity auction recently, and was intrigued with the back-and-forth bidding for the “Principal of the Day” prize. The annual auction held by this private high school in San Antonio features some extravagant items, even a 30-day around-the-world cruise. As you can already tell, the school is tailored for individuals with deep pockets.

Principal for the Day

Parents bid on the prize of making their teenager principal for a day. The student will get the opportunity to take control of the school for the day, and will be envy of all the students. Probably not!

The bidding started at $200, and I thought it was going to fizzle quickly. I understand that a principal’s job is challenging, but I’m sure the winner will have limited powers. The highlight of the day might be ringing the bell, or making an end-of-day announcement. “It was great being your principal today. Thank you for behaving!” What can you really say?

The Eager Bidders

After the bidding hit $500, there were just two dads in the game. From what I know, their kids are rivals in the school, and the parents will do whatever possible to get the upper hand.

The bidding soon soared past the $1,000 and kept climbing. Many in the crowd were as shocked as I was that this prize was so valuable. Some wondered if they misunderstood the prize. Did it include the principal’s salary or part of his retirement benefits?

Given I knew the background between the two fathers, I understood they were going to keep raising the ante. Finally, the bidding slowed when at the $1,500 mark. The incremental increases were now in the $20 range and not in the hundreds.

The Winner! 

The auctioneer raised the price to $1,700, and one father held us up his card. Like in a tennis match, the crowd swung their heads to the other bidder. Showing nervousness, and at the same time some level of relief, he shook his head. The $1,700 price was too high, and he was prepared to lose this battle.

The winner was announced, and a smattering of applause was heard throughout the crowd. The winning parent looked more embarrassed than happy. I could sense the wife was a bit overwhelmed with the price, but looked happy that her hubby stuck with it and offered the highest bid. After all, her son could now rule the school for one entire day.

Takeaway

I’m not sure where to begin with the takeaway. I understand this was a charity event, and the money will be used for scholarships, textbooks, enhancements in technology, and so on. The benefits are obvious.

From a parent’s standpoint, I wonder the message this sends our children. “My dad paid $1,700 for me to be principal for the day.” It’s unlikely that line will carry any weight during a job interview. Moreover, leadership positions have more value when earned, and not bought.

Come to think of it … many of the problems we have around the world today arise from people who want something of value without the desire to earn it on their own.

I attended the graduation of a family member who recently completed his 4-year degree from a university in Central Texas. The graduation was scheduled for Saturday at 2 p.m., and I decided to drive up a bit earlier, which would allow me to get a good view to take pictures.

When I arrived at the facility, I ran into a colleague who worked at the university. He seemed a bit pre-occupied, which was normal because of the many duties assigned to him pertaining to the ceremony.

Our Chat

Me: Hey, Willie! It’s good to see you.

Willie: Jimmie! I heard from Sam (my nephew) that you were coming today. Glad that you could make it.

Me: I wanted to get a good seat, so I came early. It’s just 1 p.m., so I am here super-early. You look busy!

Willie: Yeah. Way too busy! I’m not sure why I’m always in charge of so much graduation-related stuff. I was supposed to have help from Martina, but her husband is ill, and she can’t make it.

Me: Is there anything I can do to help you?

Willie: Look … we are expecting the commencement speaker, and he was scheduled to arrive from Dallas at 12:45 p.m., but I haven’t seen him. Do you mind waiting near the front of the building for him? His name is Charlie.

Me: No problem. Let me go do that right now.

Willie: When he gets here. Please escort him to the stage area right through that door.

Me: You got it!

With my new orders, I went to the front of the building, and waited for about 10 minutes. At close to 1:15 p.m.there was no sign of Charlie. I waited another 5 minutes, and still no Charlie. I thought perhaps he snuck in through a side or back door. I went to Willie for additional guidance.

Me: Willie, I haven’t seen Charlie. Has he called you?

Willie: Let me check my phone. I have a voicemail, so let me see who called. It’s a phone number from the 214 area code, and that is Dallas, right?

Me: I think so.

Willie: Woah! He did call, and apparently his car stalled in Waco, and doesn’t think he will make it.

Me: What is your back-up plan?

Willie: I don’t think we have one. I know we need a commencement speaker.

Me: Why don’t you ask a dean or the president?

Willie: That just won’t look right. We need someone from outside the university to deliver a good message. How about you?

Me: You’re joking, right?

Willie: We really need you.

Me: Let me give it a try.

I had about 25 minutes to prepare for the commencement speech. I wrote six major points to cover, and used plenty of examples. We had more than 1,000 attendees, and the speech went fine. It wasn’t perfect, but I’m glad that I accepted the challenge.

Of course, the next time I would hope to get at least 24-hours notice.

P.S.: While I don’t smoke, someone gave me a cigar, and I decided to pretend! I think it calmed my nerves (see picture).

After three weeks of using NFL replacement referees during the regular season, the National Football League is under tremendous pressure to settle the labor dispute with its officials. The Green Bay at Seattle Monday Night Football matchup had to be a nightmare experience for Commissioner Roger Goodell. There were a few notable blown calls during the game, and the ruling of a touchdown that gave Seattle the win was a misinterpretation of the catch rule.

My NBA Experience

I have more than 20 years of experience refereeing basketball games at different levels, from junior high all the way to the NBA. To clarify … I was never an NBA referee, but while living in Houston, I was asked to officiate a few Houston Rocket scrimmages.

My comfort level is with Division I collegiate games, such as Wyoming vs. Colorado State or Texas-Arlington at Sam Houston State. While the games can be tough to officiate at this level, my skills have improved to the point at which I can hold my own in these games.

Differently, I remember walking onto the floor to work the Houston Rocket scrimmage. When I observed the 7 ft. tall Hakeem Olajuwon catch the ball and make a quick move to the basket, I was surprised by his agility. While I had officiated big men in the past, none of them had this level of skill.

What is My Point?

The NFL replacement officials are not rookies. Most have many years of officiating experience, but at a lower level. I’m certain that many of them are in awe when watching the speed of the players. The game itself also moves much faster, and the consequences when making a mistake are bigger than missing the same call in a JUCO football game.

There were times when I would work nearly a month of Division I collegiate games before a small college assignment appeared on my schedule. I quickly observed that the lower level game was easier to work. It almost seemed to move in slow motion. I was used to the fast-pace of the highly-skilled players.

Respect Makes a Difference

One important aspect in officiating is having the respect of coaches and players. I’ve known some referees that are average, but they have two decades of experience. Through longevity, they have gained the respect from coaches.

The replacement referees have not gained respect, which means that coaches and players are constantly complaining about calls, even the ones they get right. The barrage of complaints makes it hard to focus on officiating the game. In some cases, they are distracted to the point that a call is missed. Once officials show they can be intimidated, the coaches and players are in control of the game, which causes anarchy.

The NFL replacement referees have a tough job, but they did sign up for it. My guess is that the NFL leadership team underestimated the experience and knowledge of its officials. Refereeing at the highest level requires competent and confident referees who understand the spirit and intent of the rules. Experienced officials are less likely to making glaring mistakes, such as those we are witnessing with the temporary refs.

The NFL put a low priority on the importance of its officiating, and today Commissioner Goodell is looking for a workable solution that will allow him to save face.

As in any other subdivision, there are several stop signs and speed bumps near where I live. The speed limit is a weird 21 mph. For the most part, homeowners in our area adhere to the law, and I haven’t observed any accidents since I moved there in 2003.

The Situation

After a long day of work, somewhere around 7 p.m., I traveled down a street that I consider the shorter route to my house. In reality, it saves me about 30 seconds, but that’s enough to make a difference, especially when I’m trying to get home to a sensible dinnertime.

About a block from my home, there is a 4-way stop. Many of us slow down, almost to a complete stop, but we proceed if the way is clear. On this particular evening, traffic was quiet, and I must admit that I did not come to a complete stop.

The Self-Appointed Cop

A man driving a Ford Explorer was approaching the intersection, and he observed that I rolled the stop sign. I noticed that he turned left, which was unusual because most motorists take a right, which leads them out of the subdivision. Of course, this meant that he was coming after me.

On this particular evening, I decided to park my car in the driveway, which gave him a chance to confront me.

Appointed Cop: Are you aware that you didn’t come to a complete stop?

Me: I guess you’re right. I slowed down, but noticed that no one was around.

Appointed Cop: We have laws around here.

[I’m not sure if he meant that other parts of the United States don’t have laws.]

Me: Yes. I’m sure we have laws.

Appointed Cop: You need to make sure and stop next time.

Me: It’s probably best that you get on your way. I have dinner plans with my family, and need to go.

Following someone to his home is probably not a good idea. I decided to take the high-road and walk away, but there are many other cases in which the situation could get volatile. Does this newly appointed cop plan to patrol the stop signs in our neighborhood and will follow all violators to their homes? I guess he might consider making a citizen’s arrest.

The point here is that those of us who live in the subdivision are careful and, for the most part, we follow the traffic laws. Rolling through a stop sign is an issue, but the San Antonio Police Department (SAPD) has yet to assign an officer to cite those who violate. My guess is that the issue is of small importance.

How to solve this predicament? Let’s assume that I follow the traffic laws from that day forward, and always make a complete stop. Will this make the newly appointed officer happy? Since this encounter, I have been more conscious of the stop sign, and perhaps even meet the traffic requirement on most occasions.

However, I did notice the other day that I beat someone to the same 4-way stop, but she decided to go before me. Should I follow her home and scold her for failing to give me the right of way?

Unfortunately, when I needed him the most, our eager police officer was nowhere to be found.

When I break my diet, you will usually find me at a Dairy Queen. The Oreo Cookie Blizzard is one of my favorites, and CalorieKing.com calculates that the medium serving has 680 calories. Wow!

A few weeks ago while on a road trip to my hometown of Uvalde, Texas, I decided to fuel-up in Hondo. Dairy Queens are popular in small towns, and Hondo is no exception. I was craving a Blizzard, and I decided to pass-up lunch so that I could enjoy this favorite ice cream treat.

While waiting in line to place my order, I heard two middle-aged ladies having a conversation that went something like this:

DEBRA: Hi, Jackie! I’m glad you were able to meet me here.

JACKIE: Hey, Debra! I had lots of work this morning, so I needed a break this afternoon.

DEBRA: How’s your boss doing? Does he still tell you that you’re “so pretty”?

JACKIE: Yeah … he knows I’m married, but I don’t really think that he cares.

DEBRA: Isn’t that called sexual harassment?

JACKIE: I’m not sure. I think that he’s just joking around. I guess he likes girls that are a little chubby because I’ve got some pounds to shed. The other girls tell me that he’s just that way.

DEBRA: What way is that?

JACKIE: He’s always saying nice things to them. I think he bought Jenny some flowers and chocolates for her birthday. For obvious reasons, she didn’t take them home.

DEBRA: I guess that’s a good idea. Brian might be concerned about who gave them to her.

JACKIE: I think it’s almost our turn to order. What are you going to have?

DEBRA: I’m not sure … but I’m sure hungry. I went to see my doctor the other day because I’m getting short-winded. I’m not sure what’s going on, but I get tired much quicker than in the past. I’m only 43 years old! I should still be in good shape.

JACKIE: I guess it happens to all of us. We start losing a step here-and-there.

DEBRA: I think that I’ve lost more than one step. By the time Friday rolls around, I’m nearly dead. My husband wants to do stuff around the house, go to the movies, or visit his parents, but I’m not up for it. I only want to sleep or sit on the couch and watch House Hunters International. I workout by walking to the kitchen to eat!

JACKIE: You’re too funny! What did your doctor recommend?

DEBRA: He said I needed to eat more dairy products. I guess it makes sense that we’re here at Dairy Queen. I think I’m going to order the Peanut Butter Bash! I thought about the Banana Split, but that’s probably overkill. I do have to work a few more hours today.

JACKIE: Yeah! You can’t fall asleep!

I’m unsure what value dairy products have on our diets, but I’m almost certain that Debra’s doctor fell short of recommending a Dairy Queen dessert. I think the recommendation was probably Skim Milk instead of Whole Milk. Regardless, Debra ordered here dairy treat and soon made it disappear.