Kool Derby

You’re not too excited about the holiday party this year, but it seems like an obligatory event. Last year you made up an excuse that few believed, and you skipped it. This is a new year, and you are going to make the best of it.

Holiday parties provide a great opportunity to mingle with co-workers and with those running the company. In fact, it seems this is one of the few times you interact with the leadership team.

There is a downside to holiday parties, though. With the help of a little booze, you could end up saying something stupid. If you say it to the wrong person, someone who misinterprets the meaning, it could lead to the end of the road for you.

Here are 10 stupid things you need to keep to yourself at this year’s holiday party:

  1. “I have no idea how that idiot became the CEO. No wonder we’re failing.”
  2. “My plan is to be here another 6 months. After that, I’m outta here!”
  3. “I just sent you that hot picture of Yvonne! She looks even better in person!” [Sent from company-paid iPhone]
  4. “He looks ridiculous in that outfit. This is not a Halloween Party!”
  5. “Mr. President, I wanted to let you know that it’s not my fault that our department is doing poorly. I do my work, and I do it well.”
  6. “Is this a funeral?”
  7. [To department manager] “Deborah, this wine is making me feel so good. In fact, I don’t feel much right now. This might be a good time to tell you how I feel about your leadership skills. You see … at times, you come across sort of rude. Others tell me you have potential, but I have yet to see it. Keep working at it, and let me know how I can help you get better. I’m here for you. Be back in a bit … need another Chardonnay. Is that what they call it?”
  8. [To CFO] “Jack, how’s your work coming along? I’m sure you’re a busy guy. What’s up with the gray hair? Can’t handle the pressure? Look, the other day, we couldn’t figure out what to do with the excess $225,000, so I recommended to my manager that we add it to the ‘Consultant’ bucket. We’re going to spend it sometime in the future. Heck, we might even use it to award bonuses. You know how the system works [wink]. By the way, what is a bean counter?’”
  9. [To Director or Marketing – from Steve] “Wow, Stephanie! You’ve come a long ways. It’s hard to believe a woman can make it this big and become the Director of Marketing for a Fortune 1,000 company. I know you’re good at what you do, but undoubtedly there were some men who were passed up because the company needed to focus on diversity this year. Regardless, even if you weren’t the best candidate, you’ve got the position. I’m so proud of you!”
  10. “Wow! This is a great party! Why is it that we’re the only ones here?”

The point here is to be careful with what you say. If you’re going to have a few drinks, make sure you remain in control. In short, think of the consequences before making a stupid comment.